Fic: Love Never Dies 3 Part 1
Jun. 28th, 2009 09:54 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
emeraldreeve.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
indeedsir_backupFic: Love Never Dies
Chapter Three
Author: Emerald
Thank you for the wonderful look over!
Disclaimer: Jeeves and Wooster belong to Wodehouse, and I thank him for them.
Rating: R for this story. Slash.
A/N: Thank you to everyone who gave me encouragement and ideas. A special thanks to pipariperho for the fabulous ideas and aid. Thank you to hephaistia for the poke.
Jeeves found himself in a long hallway. He stood there, bewildered, for several moments, wondering how he came to be in the passageway and why he was there.
Then memories of his previous two dreams returned to him, and Jeeves knew that he could see where Jason had gone after his life time with Bion. A light from a doorway farther down the hall beckoned him, and Jeeves hastened to the entry-way. The door was opened slightly, and the valet slipped inside. He found himself in a cramped and rather stuffy small bedroom. A man laid on his side, stretched out on a pallet, one arm over his ear. The heartache emitting from the man was such that Jeeves was afraid to touch him. He did not desire a stronger sense of sorrow.
From a nearby room came the sounds of passion, and Jeeves understood the cause of the man's heartbreak. He sighed softly. Ramose had never had to share Weni with anyone, and Jason had never experienced the pain of knowing his friend had taken another lover. For the first time, the man was feeling the anguish of knowing that his friend was intimate with someone else. It was not just his grief, but that also of Ramose's and Jason's flooding his spirit.
Jeeves sat next to the man and although he knew he would not be heard, he asked, “Why do you keep doing this, Ramose? Is it true that inverts are not allowed into heaven? Are the two of you cast out and so you repeat an endless cycle?”
These thoughts depressed Jeeves, and he was glad that the man next to him could not easily discern him. He continued, “I have been through this myself, but it was not as bad. I was jealous, but nowhere near as heartbroken. I wasn't in love with him or so I told myself.”
Jeeves searched his mind for the other's memories, and they came to him easily. The first recollection was what was fresh and recent in the man's mind; an event that had taken place only three hours ago.
The man's master, Lucius, saying, “Don't wait up for me, Julius.”
Jeeves felt Julius' anxiety and worry, but the servant had bravely said, “May I speak with you freely, master?”
“Of course, Julius.”
“I...” the servant paused, his courage rapidly fading. Before it could disappear entirely, he declared, “There is no need to go to Claudius. I would offer my services. I can give you whatever you get from him. I...”
“No, Julius. I will not use a servant in such a manner.”
Julius had longed to cry out that such use would be merciful. It would hurt far less than listening to his master receive pleasure from someone else. How many more of these nights would he have to endure?
Instead, he had bowed his head and said, “Yes, master.”
Jeeves was grateful that his employer had kept any affairs he had conducted from his servant's knowledge for many years now.
A moan of delight from the nearby room brought Julius crashing down farther, and he bit his lip to stifle a whimper of pain.
Trying to distract himself from the mutters of bliss, Julius began to concentrate on his favourite memories. Jeeves was relieved when these recollections floated into his consciousness. He had begun to feel the full extent of the man's anguish. The images came to him clear and vivid as if Julius was attempting to use each one to replace his unhappiness with reminiscences of happiness.
The first memory that Julius used to block out the misery of the current time was of Lucius offering him an olive. He had shocked both of them by accepting it with his mouth instead of his fingers. Lucius had laughed upon seeing his friend's surprise at his own actions.
Finding something to hold onto, Julius concentrated on the things Lucius loved in life; olives and the patina de Piris he made that his master relished. He had served Lucius both many times.
Julius' mind wandered to his favourite pastime; that of playing checkers with Lucius. He recalled their first game. He had let Lucius win and had been scolded for it. The man had genuinely seemed to dislike being allowed to win, and Julius had never repeated his error.
The best part of his life were the times he massaged Lucius with perfumed oil. These were the only times that he touched his master. His desire for Lucius made the minutes tortuous, but the freedom to touch the man made the physical pining worth it.
Julius fell asleep while thinking of his most cherished memory; the night Lucius had invited him to recline with his family at dinner. Julius had known that he was about to be given his freedom and had taken his place at Lucius' side with both joy and apprehension over the future. Lucius had announced to his family and their guests that Julius was now free.
Nothing had changed in Julius' life. He had not wished to leave Lucius' side, and the man had been clear that he hoped Julius would stay in his service. Lucius had paid him for his tasks since he had first become the man's slave. Lucius did not approve of slavery, and he told Julius that he might need money one day.
Jeeves sat next to Julius, who was now asleep. There was silence from the next room. Yet the valet felt no pull drawing him back to London. Instead he sensed that he had something to do here; what he had no idea.
As Jeeves puzzled over what his task could possibly be; he glanced down at the sleeping man, feeling pity. Even in his sleep, Jeeves could feel the man's despair. He wondered if it would help Julius to know of Ramose and Jason. He could use some of Jason's self-assurance, Jeeves thought, and it might give him enough confidence to fight for Lucius' love. He has given up.
Reaching over, Jeeves placed a hand on Julius, letting the man's spirit ebb into his own. As it did so, the valet began to remember all he could of Ramose and Weni first and then of Jason and Bion. And Julius began to dream.
In London, Jeeves turned in his sleep and for several hours forgot Julius and his troubles.
When he next became conscious of the hallway and a door with light shining from under it, Jeeves felt hesitant about approaching that entry. What had happened with Julius? Jeeves knew how he would feel if his employer blatantly conducted affairs around him.
The desire to know how Julius was faring was stronger than the reluctance he felt. Upon opening the door, the first thing Jeeves became aware of was the smell of roasting fish. Two men were sitting around a small fire, roasting bread and fish. The sun was setting over the nearby sea.
One of them was saying, “I know you wanted to open a shop one day, Julius. Why not still do that? I can write anywhere. We can live in rooms above the shop.”
Julius answered, “I fear it is a step down for you and...”
“Nonsense! Complete and utter! I'll be happy with you, no matter what. And imagine the ideas such an endeavour would give me for my writing!”
“Are you certain, Lucius?”
“Yes! I've thought about it a lot; how it would change our lives. I'm ready now.”
All Jeeves sensed from Julius was happiness. Having heard the man's name spoken, Jeeves turned his attention to Lucius, experiencing an odd stirring in his heart as he gazed upon the Roman. He felt drawn to the man and cautiously Jeeves moved forward.
Jeeves approached Lucius and placed a hand on his shoulder. There was no sense of becoming one with the man, but what Jeeves did experience surprised him. The man sensed him; only in a subconscious way, but nevertheless a part of Lucius' spirit recognised Jeeves. Lucius' shoulder relaxed under his touch; the same response Jeeves received from Mr. Wooster when his valet gripped his shoulder after a meal.
Jeeves stood there, his mind racing. Lucius' spirit knew his own. That meant... the valet took a breath. That meant that he was Ramose. Which meant that Bertram Wooster was Weni. For a second, Jeeves told himself that just because he was Ramose, it did not follow that his employer was Weni. Yet the valet recalled the strong sentiment that he often experienced with Mr. Wooster; the feeling that he belonged at the man's side. Now he understood why.
Jeeves' heart lifted in happiness. If Mr. Wooster had once been Weni, then they were meant to be together. Surely his employer would one day come to love him as Weni had once loved Ramose, and Bion had cherished Jason.
He wondered if Lucius loved Julius and tried to sense this information from the man. Jeeves did perceive love from the man but he could not tell if that devotion was due to Lucius sensing Ramose in him or if the love was what the Roman felt toward Julius. He began to listen to the conversation again, in hopes to find the answer.
“I'm glad that you are going to have that shop you wanted.”
“You do realise that...”
There was only a slight hesitation in the sentence, but Lucius detected it. “Go on, Julius.”
“The day may come when I am independent of you. If that will bother you then I think I would prefer to leave matters as they are. I do not mind serving you.”
“You are speaking a lot of nonsense today,” Lucius said good-naturedly. “I've wanted you to have that shop since you first spoke of it. No, all the hard, painful moments are over and done with. I'll be fine.”
There was a brief silence before Julius said, “I do not recall giving you 'hard, painful moments'.”
“Well, considering all the hurt I gave you; they aren't much to speak of. I was referring to freeing you. Don't get me wrong, I wanted you to be free. I was just afraid of the consequences. And freeing you meant that I couldn't really call you mine. I didn't like that much. Asking you to join me at the meal wasn't so bad. I was happy for you, and I like having you at my side. Going in front of the magistrate; now that was hard.”
Another silence fell as the two men ate. Jeeves moved to stand by Julius with the idea of seeking his memories when Lucius spoke again. “Did I ever tell you when I became aware that I loved you?”
“No. I would like to know.”
“We were having a rather rotten quarrel over...”
“We were disagreeing and that made you realise you loved me?”
“This tone of disbelief in your voice is most unpleasant. We were quarrelling over rings. I wanted more than one. Considering the party I was going to, I don't think it showed a lack of taste to wear several, but you were convinced that it was. Gnaeus had sixteen at that party.”
There was a brief pause before Lucius said, “If no one has ever told you that you're stubborn, Julius, then I'm informing you of it now. Mind you, I love you more than anything, but there's definitely stubbornness in your basic nature.”
“Perhaps if you were more reasonable, I would not need to be stubborn,” Julius teased.
Lucius laughed. “Be that as it may, and I completely deny it, we were trading words, and I realised that you were not wearing even one ring. And that I wished to put one on your finger.”
Jeeves glanced down at Julius' hand and noted the ring on the man's finger. Lucius was wearing a matching ring.
“It took me some months to scrounge up the courage to tell you of my love.”
Confident now that Julius was loved, Jeeves placed a hand on the man's shoulder. Julius was reflecting on a day that had occurred three years previously.
Julius had been standing by Lucius; holding a wet towel while the man ate breakfast. He had handed Lucius the towel, and his friend had captured his hand.
Lucius had said, “I have quite a few places to go today and dinner with family tonight. Will you stay at my side and hold my hand?”
For a moment, Jeeves had no idea why this question had caused Julius' heart to sing with such joy, but just as he started to wonder about it, the man's knowledge became his own. To hold hands in public was a declaration that consent had been given for marriage.
The euphoria that had captured Julius was so strong that he had been frightened by it. Hesitantly, he asked, “Do you mean it?”
“I've never meant any thing more. Will you?”
“I will!”
Even now, the happiness of that moment was just as strong as when it was new.
On the beach, Lucius asked, “Well, Julius, will you hold my hand again and take a walk along the shore with me?”
“I would be glad to!”
From somewhere far away, Jeeves sensed that dawn was beginning to lighten the skies in London. No, Jeeves thought in alarm, I am not ready to leave yet. He let Julius' sense of self almost dominate his own as he sought certain knowledge.
How had Julius' relationship with Lucius changed so dramatically? He searched for that night when Julius' heart had been slowly and agonisingly broken. He had difficulty locating it, for there was some resistance on Julius' part. The man had set it aside, and the scars were almost completely faded, healed by the love Lucius had lavished upon him. The amount of healing astonished Jeeves. Would he, too, one day forget all of the heartache he had suffered from an unrequited love?
Part 2 is here: community.livejournal.com/indeedsir/669011.html
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Date: 2009-06-29 06:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-29 06:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-29 04:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 03:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-29 06:54 am (UTC)I have one minor, silly, and totally pendantic quibble that you can feel free to ignore. I was reading along, quite charmed with the story, but when I came upon the nicknames 'Jul' and 'Luc' it was like hitting an unexpected speedbump. It's just that...um...I teach Latin. And the -us endings on the names are the grammatical case endings that show how the noun (in this case the name) functions in a sentence. Almost all nouns (and all Roman names) always have them. Seeing the case endings missing is *weird* and makes the teacherly half of my brain light up and my right hand twitch for a red pen to scribble some case endings back on.
(On a cultural note, just calling someone by their praenomem (first name) is a sign of great familiarity. e.g. Most people, even most friends, would call Gaius Julius Caesar 'Caesar' or 'Julius Caesar' whereas only those truly closest to him would ever call him Gaius.)
But my obsession with Latin grammar aside, I'm totally squeeing with all my classicist heart about how Jeeves is Tiro to Bertie's Cicero.
*uses the classicist icon of classics in approval*
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Date: 2009-06-29 07:40 am (UTC)I think {hope} I've changed all those pesky names in this section. I'll be checking part 2 in a second. Thanks for mentioning it! If that's my only major error then that's good. I rely entirely on books and web sites for my information on the times.
I like the first name information, too.
I love your icon! Did you make it?
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Date: 2009-06-29 08:28 pm (UTC)Thanks! I did indeed make it; it was the unofficial motto of my old department.
(And while we're talking icons, OMG! Christopher Foyle ♥)
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Date: 2009-06-30 03:48 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-29 04:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 03:57 am (UTC)And considering that I found several typos in it afterwards, it was very nice that every error was not pointed out, just what was probably the biggest and most helpful for the story.
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Date: 2009-06-29 01:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-30 04:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-06-29 09:36 pm (UTC)I'm enjoying this very much but I must say I am giggling a good deal because of the name 'Lucius'. (Yes, too many Harry Potters, I admit...) No other problems, just hard to imagine him to be kind and such when I can't stop thinking about how cool that actor's hair was.
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Date: 2009-06-30 04:35 am (UTC)Lucius of HP did have cool hair. I chose Lucius because there was an ancient Roman by that name, who was a writer, and I like him. I like the name, too.
Thank you!
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Date: 2009-06-30 06:02 am (UTC)What I really like about this series is that, even though Jeeves and Bertie are meant to always be together, they still have to work for it. It isn't just going to magically happen.
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Date: 2009-06-30 06:28 am (UTC)It may be Bertie you'll feel for once the next chapter is read.
I think it's a very rare few that have everything just fall nicely together in a relationship; most of the time relationships do take work. I'm glad this seems realistic. I'm such a romantic that I fear I lean toward the romance and not the reality enough, sometimes.
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Date: 2009-06-30 06:39 am (UTC)I'm such a romantic that I fear I lean toward the romance and not the reality enough, sometimes.
I've never had that feeling from your stories. They are very romantic, but you don't shy away from the rough spots in Bertie & Jeeves's relationship.
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Date: 2009-06-30 06:59 am (UTC)I'm glad my stories do seem to deal with the rough as well as the smooth. I don't see either character as perfect or even the relationship as perfect.
Thanks!