In Search of Lost Fic + Rec me a Bertie fic

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What ho, everyone!

First, I'm searching for a fic which has sadly biffed off amid the mists of memory. It's so unique and bizarre that I'm not even sure it exists? Or did I make it up? It involves Jeeves leaving Bertie's employment, setting up in a resort somewhere, and playing a germane Oscar Wilde type to the resort guests. There's a conversation on the beach where he points out one of the girls' white dress only looks demure, but when the owner steps in front of sunlight, the whole thing looks transparent and it shows off her figure. He tells someone: "Why should I go to the world, when the world can come to me?"

He eventually returns to Bertie, and Bertie in his absence has learnt to do basic household tasks and is doing okay. He had never engaged another valet.

Second thing - rec me a writer!Bertie fic! I mean, P.G. Wodehouse is a recognized Literary Genius and Prose-smith (made that word up). In the J&W world it's Bertie coming up with all these wonderful narrative flourishes and fantastic dialogue. Rec me a fic where someone recognises that Bertie is more than just a member of the blood-sucking aristocracy.

Thanks everyone very much!